If a sinking ship can be saved, so is your relationship. You can save your stormy relationship and rekindle the love that you had with your lover. It is normal for once a blissful relationships to go through rocks and if proper measures are not put in place, the relationship will face unexpected death. Saving a stormy relationship requires efforts from the two partners and is you are the best tips of how to save your relationship, returning it to what it used to be when the two of you started dating.
1.Find out the cause of your friction
Every river has its source and every relationship problem has an origin. The source of your problem doesn't have to be something. It may be something small that you once considered worthless. Try to figure out when a rift started developing between the two of you. Whether it is unfaithfulness or you just find yourselves incompatible. From this, you will decide on the right approach that you should use to solve the problem.
2. Whether the relationship is worth saving
Some relationships are worth saving while others are not, it all depends on how much you have invested on it and the willingness of your partner. Saving a relationship calls for the willingness of both the partners. If your partner is not ready or is unwilling to participate in the process, don't waste your time and energy. Do not consider saving an abusive relationship.
3. Choose a perfect time
Time is of essence in a relationship so picking a perfect timing and a perfect location can help you to streamline your relationship. Try to pick a time when both of you are not occupied with any other activity. This will enable the two of you to communicate easily. In addition to timing, try as much as possible to pick a very private place.
4. Analyse yourself
Sometimes the problem may not be your partner but you. Rather than passing all the blame to your lover, sit down and start analysing yourself. Reflecting on your inner self will help you to clear the stumbling blocks that you might created in the course of your relationship.
5. Discuss with your partner about the problem
It is obvious that both of you are fully aware of the problem that is straining your relationship. Take a big step of saving the relationship by having a big talk. Wait till the two of you are in a sober state of mind then initiate a talk about how to save your dying relationship. Do not dominate the talk but try to give your partner time to talk and be a good listener.
6. Figure out your living pattern
Your daily living pattern could be the one that put your partner. This comes down to the little things that you do daily. Maybe coming home late, not replying texts, snoring among other odd habits. List down both of your living patterns and let your partner mark the odd ones.
7. Set some time alone
Even though you are in a relationship, you don't have to be together all the time and you don't have to call or text each other all the time. Schedule some minutes or even an hour just to be alone without thinking about your lover. It will re-energise you and make you think about new strategies.
8. Limit the use of gadgets at night
Televisions, computers, smartphones and other elctronic gadgets can make you to drift away from your partner. You may hide behind watching TV instead of discussing your relationship problems. Turn off the TV and switch off the internet in your house immediately after the dinner. This will help you to focus on your problems.
9. Be fully open to each other
Truth hurts but it is valuable especially in relatioship. Being open and honest wiith each other means that you can trust each other over anything no matter how delicate it may be. Do not hide anything from your partner but instead open up about your feelings whether good or bad.
10. Be attentive to your partner
in serious relationships such as marriage, men tend to assume that the buck stops after honeymoon. A man will stop giving her lady full attention which he used to give while they were dating. The result of this is a woman will feel neglected and will start repulsing the man. Show that you care for her by always complimenting her or trying to know how her day was.
11. Be physically present for key conversations
Though technology has made it easier for people to communicate, it should not be overused at the expense of other forms of communication. It is true that you can simply text your partner or express your feelings via email but when it comes to saving your relationship, you need to be physically present. Have a face to face conversation with your partner.
12. Change your routine
Routines are boring, monotonous and can drain your relationship. They tend to make your lives less interesting as you will not anticipate for anything new. Plan for a surprise dinner out and or just alter your daily program. Doing this will help to reignite your dying romance.
13. Make everyday your Valentine's Day
Don't wait for special days or occasions so as to show how much you love and appreciate your partner. Make every day special by doing those special things which are always reserved for these days. When you come across something nice,buy for him or her. Take your partner out to a romantic gateway whether it is Christmas day or not.
14. Work as a team
You don't always have to be enemies in disguise especially when your relationship is going through a rocky path. Inject teamwork spirit in your relationship by trying to solve a problem from one side rather than from two opposite sides. When faced with a problem, try to find a common ground where nobody will feel downplayed by the final decision.
15. Have a forgiving heart
Even though you may be the one who was wronged, learn to forgive your partner. The art of forgiveness will remove any stumbling block that is standing in your relationship and will also make you to recover faster.
16. Agree to disagree
Though you may be a perfect couple, there are some differences between the two of you. Don't subdue these differences but instead learn to disagree. Accept and live with each other's differences.
17. Increase physical contact
Increase physical contact between the two of you. Hold hands in public, hug, kiss, rub shoulder, high fives and other forms of physical contact other than sex will increase make the bond between the two of you to be tight. Take advantage of any moment to bottom spat your partner and see the smile that you will be given.
18. Be accountable on your part
Be responsible by doing all that it takes to do your best in the relationship, especially when going through a hard time. Playing your part to the fullest will win you admiration from your partner and in the end things between the two of you will go back to normal.
19. Do not put your partner down
The biggest mistake that you can do when your relationship is going through a rough cycle is to put down your partner. Try as much as possible not to blame your partner for the current predicaments that the two of you are going through. Do not take advantages of his or her flaws to win arguments neither should you use past mistakes to build on your case. Always use "I" instead of "You".
20. Don't try to change your partner
Trying to change your spouse so as to suit your ideal man or ideal woman will add you more trouble and stress. Accept the fact that nobody is perfect and even those couples that look perfect on cameras have their own flaws. Reminding your partner about his or her shortcomings will end up polarizing the two of you.
21. Try to avoid nagging, complaining and criticizing your partner
Life has lots of pressures which can range from career to social life. The pressure may be too much till it overwhelms one of your partner. When it happens, do not start complaining and nag your partner revealing his or her weaker side. Before saying something, take at least 10 seconds to think about it and the effects that those words will have on your partner. Nagging will drift your partner away.
22. Limit external interference
In the modern society, you relationship is always under watch by different type sof people in the society. Some people may have good intetions for you while others may be having ill intentions. They are happy when your relationship is not doing well. Do not listen to everyone who is claiming to offer you relationship advice. Choose your friends wisely especially those who have had a blissful relationship.
23. Be fair to your partner
Fairness does not only apply in the political world but it should also be applied in your relationship especially when you are in bad terms with your partner. Is your woman doing all the chores while you are watching the TV or even sleeping? Is you husband struggling to pay the bills yet you are fully capable to do so?
24. Make your relationship your priority
There are many other equally important things in life that you cannot ignore as they are what define you. They include education, career, religious beliefs, friends and even family members. Though you cannot ignore them, you should not allow them to stand between you and your relationship. Prioritize relationship before anything else.
25. Set your boundaries
Even as you are win your lover back, set your boundaries. Setting your limits will prevent the same mistakes from happening again in the future date.If your partner went to a certain social place such as a pub and you were not happy about it, say it and warn him or her never to go there.
26. Study your partner's love language
You may wrongfully resenting your partner simply because both of you don't know about each other's love language. Take your time to study how your partner expresses love and then respond accordingly. These love languages include, words, gifts, services and physical contact.
27. Do your hobbies togeher
You may have different hobbies but try spare some time aside to enjoy your hobbies together. The two of you can decide to go hiking, cooking, swimming or play a music instrument together. This will help you to rekindle your love and reconnect.
28. Keep the communication line on
Keep your communication lines on even when things between you and your love are not going on well. If you are in a long distance relationship,try to keep in contact with your partner using video communication platforms such as Skype. Constantly make calls and text to know how your partner is doing though you should not overdo it.
29. Go for counselling
Professional counselling can help to save your dying relationship. Most of the counsellors have good experience when it comes to handling relationship issues. A counsellor will help you to identify real problems that the two of you are having and will help you to get the solutions.
30. Don't strain to save a bad relationship
There are some relationships that are not worth saving and one of them is if your partner is abusive. An abusive partner will always try to bring you down both mentally and physically. By staying in it or trying to save it, you will be doing more harm than good to yourself.
31. Reignite your sexual life
Sex plays a very critical role in a relationship and it may be the reason as to why your relationship is going through a rough terrain. Try out new sexual styles and experiment of new adventures in your bedroom'
32. End a relationship
Sometimes things may not go on well as you expected. Your partner may not be willing to save the relationship no matter how hard you are trying. In such situations save your time and energy by ending the relationship. Bigger and better things are waiting for you ahead.